Steven Weissman

Comments

1

"Consider the purpose of escalators: To help people ascend great vertical distances in situations where stairs may be too cumbersome."

There are elevators you know. Get out of my way on the moving steps.

2

I'd agree with this more if the stairways in many of the light rail stations weren't hidden.

3

If mobility is really that much of an issue, take the elevator. The escalator exists to enhance the mobility of the already mobile, not grant you a lazy reprieve from your duty to walk.

4

7/10 Troll attempt. Bravo, writer. Bravo.

5

Sure, if there's a huge crowd, then by all means cram everyone on the escalator wherever they'll go, but if there are a total of three people there and one of them's camping on the left, then can't you just let people go by? It's like hanging out doing the speed limit in the left lane of a nearly empty highway. Just, how hard is it to move over and let people go from time to time, even if yo don't agree with their life priorities?

6

The elderly, voluptuous and lazy-ass idiots can queue on the right.

7

@5:

Poor analogy, since escalators are essentially one-lane thoroughfares and if one was to extend your "lane analogy" then one shouldn't be passing slower moving persons at all, just as you're not allowed to do so on roads that are too narrow to allow for such overtaking to be accomplished safely. How many videos have we seen of some idiot rushing up - or down an escalator, shoving against people in the process, only to trip on a bag or piece of luggage or otherwise lose their footing (or get hung up on the moving hand strip) and tumble ass-over-tea kettle? In such instances they're a danger not only to themselves but to everyone else around them.

I've yet to see many escalators intentionally designed to be wide enough to allow safe passing, and there's a good reason why they're not - because it's unsafe as hell. And yet everyone seems to assume it's their inalienable right to rush up and down them as fast as they can manage and to hell with anyone who gets in their way. Why should I risk my safety just so you can barrel up or down a flight of moving stairs at (literally) breakneck speed?

If you're in that much of a hurry, maybe you should have planned your trip a little better so that you arrive with plenty of time to get to where you need to go without endangering others, ya' think?

8

Charles was right on this one.

9

@7 Everyone hates you and your feet stink.

10

the civil breakdown is total.

11

Shorter @9: "I got nuthin'..."

12

There is a tiny minority of people for whom moving on an escalator is a "safety issue", and there's an even tinier minority for whom someone else moving on an escalator is a "safety issue." Nobody begrudges these people standing still. But clinging to the fantasy that you're one of these people when in reality you just prefer to stand still is pathetic as fuck. And standing in the way of others for your sad little "safety issue" fantasy makes you an asshole. You're the type of person who might yell "assault" if someone brushes past them in a crowd.

13

"Why should I risk my safety just so you can barrel up or down a flight of moving stairs at (literally) breakneck speed?"

How about just letting people walk at a normal safe speed, mister straw-man? If you're that close to (literally) grave injury because someone else moved on an escalator, you don't belong there. (literally)

15

@12:

How would you even know it's a "tiny minority"? Comparing the number of people who DON'T feel the need - for whatever reason - to rush pell-mell up and down escalators, versus those who DO, I'd say you have that majority/minority headcount exactly the opposite of what it actually is.

@13: Define "normal speed" on a moving staircase...

17

Whe abroad recently I noticed escalators with warning stickers along the inside gap warning against walking. Best escalator experience I’ve had in a long time.

People should be free to walk but I agree the expectations are backwards.

18

I'd call "normal speed" pretty much any speed I want to go that isn't causing anyone else a problem. Typically, I just use the same walking speed I'd use on regular stairs. It's pretty chill, actually, I just don't usually prefer standing still like a lump with my thumb in my nose. No "pell-mell" running, swear to god.

How often are you seeing escalator accidents? I am highly amused that your otherwise perfectly reasonable preference for standing still has morphed into accusing people walking past you of ENDANGERING YOUR LIFE ("(literally)").

19

if you're in that
Bigga Hurry get
some gum-soled
shoes and Run up
the Handrail. it can't
be That hard. or seek

Stairs; just think how
much Better Shape you'll
be in for Bathing Suit Weather
whilst you Chuckle at the Weaklings

20

If you can, be kind and stand to the right so that people can pass. You never know why they are in a hurry, and it may just be that they don't want to just stand there, which is fine too. If you happen to be too large to move to the right or have other issues preventing such, then people should be kind to you and wait. Just don't stand in the middle to be an asshole.

21

@11 Your pedanticism about this annoying. Technically you are correct but your are a self-important prig thus no one likes you, your feet smell, and your breath is a miasma of syphilitic goat farts. Go back to your fish that you have recently microwaved in the breakroom and clipping your toenails at work.


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