Evening commute. Full bus. But do you move your backpack to open up the seat next to you? Even with people standing right there in the aisle? No, of course not. So, already I don't like you.
 
And then I see it.
That stupid little patch that you've proudly affixed to that stupid little camo backpack of yours, the one that is taking up the whole stupid seat. "FJB," it reads. Of. Fucking. Course. And of fucking course, what does it say below that? "Let's go Brandon!"
 
I guess you think you're being pretty cute? I guess you think you're really owning the libs?
 
Well *fuuuuuuck* you. Fuck you, fuck your manspreading backpack, fuck your boomer-ass Facebook memes, and fuck all the millions of other selfish, cowardly American pissants like you who think "FJB" is a clever troll. You are the fucking problem!!!!
 
Next time, at least move your sack so other people can sit, too. I may not like your type, but I still would have made a seat for you if you needed one.
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