News flash: Zoom school sucks so far (or, Microsoft Teams school if youre a Seattle Public School kid).
News flash: Zoom school sucks so far (or, Microsoft Teams school if you're a Seattle Public School kid). Mario Tama/ Getty Images

Technical problems abound during Seattle Public School's first day of the year: Many students were unable to "attend" class due to slow internet and learning platform access. According to GeekWire, the district could not say "how widespread the problem was, how many students were trying to connect, or whether the issues would be resolved before school resumes next week." GeekWire also had readers send in "first day of school" photos aka pictures of children looking at screens. It's a little sad.

7,000 Missouri college students test positive for COVID-19: Oop! College has been in session since mid-August. The infection rate for people aged 18-24 has jumped up to 45% in Missouri college towns.

Meanwhile, France shut down 22 schools: Because of COVID-19 cases.

Buckle up, bitches, e-scooters are coming to White Center next week: Spin is joining Lime in the King County's one-year pilot program, dropping off electric scooters in North Highline on Labor Day, says KIRO 7. There will be up to 50 of these bad boys at popular transit stops. Available from 8am to 8pm daily, you gotta cough up $1 to unlock and $0.25 cents to scoot.

A new COVID-19 forecast is in and it's fucking depressing: A "widely-cited model" predicts worsening outbreaks and 1.9 million more coronavirus deaths this year unless governments act, reports KOMO and AP. "The biggest issue here is that the worst is yet to come," said Dr. Christopher Murray of the Institute for Health Metrics and Evaluation at the UW.

There's a COVID outbreak at Virginia Mason: Four employees and one patient all tested positive for the virus and have been quarantined. Every patient and employee who works on the same floor has been tested and no new infections have been discovered, reports the Seattle Times. Note that an "outbreak" is defined as two or more linked cases occurring within a two-week period.

Please listen to SZA's newest song: It's hot this week, but "Hit Different" screams sad girl fall—and it's exactly what's needed.

Donald Trump swears he doesn't hate the troops: Yesterday, a report by The Atlantic said that the president thinks prisoners of war, shot down pilots, and anyone who died during a war are "losers" and "suckers." Trump is denying these claims. Multiple outlets, though, have corroborated the anonymous claims in the Atlantic piece with sources close to Trump. Turns out he does think poorly about the military. FOX News even reported that the claims were true!

In case you were wondering: Biden thinks Trump's remarks are "disgusting."

Patriot Prayer feels some heat: Facebook deactivated Patriot Prayer leader Joey Gibson's account today along with five other group members' accounts. Patriot Prayer's Instagram was also deactivated. According to the Oregonian, Facebook said the move was part of “ongoing efforts to remove Violent Social Militias from our platform.”

New Mexican airport is apparently being built on a woolly mammoth burial ground: Guess how many mammoth skulls workers found at an airport construction site north of Mexico City? The answer is 200. Don't worry, there were also 25 camels and five horses. The construction site is apparently close by where early inhabitants would trap and kill mammoths.

I tagged along with the morning march again: This time the youth-led group shut down I-5 for 20 minutes.

The demonstration was peaceful: And intentionally disruptive. However, Washington State Patrol was waiting for the cars of protesters on the other side of the Ship Canal Bridge. Troopers arrested nine protesters. Four troopers wrestled the driver of the car I was in out of the car and arrested him:

Read more about it: Here.

Finally, representation: "Hair salon had to remove job ad for 'happy’ stylist because it is 'discriminatory' against unhappy people"

Man saved from drowning by priests on a floating tiki bar: An Albany man was having some kayak trouble in the middle of the lake. He thought he was a goner until the captain of a floating tiki bar pulled him on board. The tiki bar was full of priests and seminarians on a Catholic retreat at the lake.

Tennessee woman receives letter saying she's positive for COVID-19: She had been dead for six months. She died back in February. While the fact that she didn't receive her COVID-19 test for more than six months (and posthumously) is ghastly, this also means that means she may have contracted COVID-19 before the disease was known to be widespread in the U.S.