Correlation and Causation aren't necessarily linked, as XKCD explains here: https://xkcd.com/552/

But, good try.

The sun will come out tomorrow.

Staff writer at The Stranger makes cringeworthy post simply to troll commenters.

@3 That is a pretty good summary of the Stranger's business model lately.

That suggestion to use a car less will surely overcome all the marketing showing how much fun driving your private vehicle is.