The Tip of the Iceberg

There’s a buzz around the Seattle Kraken as they prepare for their fourth season of play. After regressing from their strong 2022-23 season and playoff run, the franchise made a bold change at the end of the winter, firing head coach Dave Hakstol. Replacing him is former Coachella Valley Firebirds and Pittsburgh Penguins coach Dan Bylsma and his staff, including glass ceiling-breaker assistant coach Jessica Campbell. Add in growing young prospects, exciting free agent additions, and a brand new broadcast TV deal, and you’ve got the recipe for one exciting Kraken season. Have they got their tentacles around you? Do you feel yourself being sucked in? Here’s what you need to know to join the squid squad.

Captains of the Ship

Head Coach Dan Bylsma

  • Earned his cred with the Kraken organization coaching their AHL affiliate, the Firebirds, to back-to-back championship appearances and developing young players who have performed well since jumping to the NHL
  • Coached the 2008-09 Pittsburgh Penguins (my favorite hockey team of all time) to a Stanley Cup victory only four months after taking over the job. This time around, he’s got a full season to work with
  • Nicknamed “Disco” SUPPOSEDLY by his hockey teammates, I instead choose to believe the moniker was handed to him by Lady Gaga herself

Assistant Coach Jessica Campbell

  • Hired by Bylsma to be his assistant coach in Coachella, then came to Seattle with him when he was hired in July
  • The first woman EVER to coach behind the bench in the NHL
  • Her Twitter name is “boof_campbell” from a nickname given to her by her brother, who inspired her hockey career
  • Widely regarded as one of the best skaters in the world, regardless of gender
  • Ponytail GOALS
Kraken Assistant Coach Jessica Campbell has made history (and has a great ponytail). Steph Chambers/Getty Images

Captain ???

  • As of writing, the Kraken are currently the only NHL team without a captain, having gone captainless since Mark Giordano was traded in March 2022
  • Rumors SWIRL like a snowstorm that a new captain will be announced before today’s season opener
  • Though a popular Twitter movement long pushed for the C to be awarded to Yanni Gourde, current speculation points to veteran Jordan Eberle
  • Other names floating include Adam Larsson, Jared McCann, and Matty Beniers

Meet the Players

Matty Beniers

  • Our golden boy, our first draft pick, our rookie goal leader, our former theatre kid
  • Kiddo just signed a big grown-up contract to the tune of seven years and $50 million
  • A Michigan alum, was recently seen wearing a UW hockey sweater at practice after the Huskies’ football victory. Obviously he lost a bet, but it turns out the bet was with a UW hockey player himself.
  • What band did Matty go to Boston Calling to see? My guess is Hozier.

André Burakovsky

  • Underappreciated on his old teams despite winning two Stanley Cups, he came here to be good at two things: smirking and scoring goals (and he’s nailing both)
  • The eyebrows are pretty great, too, honestly
  • Hampered by injuries the past two seasons and very excited to be back and at full strength. Look for him to play with verve and joy.

Oliver Bjorkstrand

  • Dresses like a tax accountant, so maybe that’s the job he really wants?
  • Fourth-most goals by a Danish player in NHL history (could move to third this year)
  • Probably has the best smile on the Kraken, though I’d love to see them battle it out
  • Former Portland Winterhawk, but we’ll forgive him

Eeli Tolvanen

  • This man was drafted directly from a Wes Anderson movie, and you can’t tell me otherwise
  • Trivia fact: scored the Kraken’s first-ever playoff goal
  • Another trivia fact: has excellent hair
  • His name isn’t actually pronounced “Eel-y” but everyone posts eel gifs on Twitter when he scores

Brandon Tanev

  • You’ve seen this guy. He’s the one with the ghost face.
  • Wildly popular with the fans for his fast, physical play style and his excellent flow
  • 32 but still gets the zoomies
  • Once made out with his best friend Adam Lowry in a food delivery commercial
  • Okay, maybe “made out” was overselling it a little. You still wanna watch.
  • Was named to the 2022 Macedonian Diaspora “40 Under 40” list

Adam Larsson

  • Nicknamed “Big Cat” because he’s big and literally a cat 
  • *listening on hidden earbud* Wait, hold on, I’m getting word that last part may not actually be true
  • Has only one missed one Kraken game literally ever, and that was for the birth of his kid, so I guess that’s pretty fair
  • An image of his iconic bowl cut adorns bootleg T-shirts and stickers on lampposts throughout Seattle 
  • News of his recent four-year contract extension was broken on Twitter by bestie Vince Dunn, who simply tweeted: â€œđŸ˜ŒđŸ˜ŒđŸ˜ŒđŸ˜Œâ€

Jamie Oleksiak

  • Better known as most-decorated-Canadian-Olympian Penny Oleksiak’s big brother
  • Nicknamed “Big Rig”
  • And I do mean big, our man is 6’7”
  • Sometimes when players try to hit him, they just bounce, and that’s pretty funny
  • Check out his beautiful tattoos 

Will Borgen

  • 6’3” and ostensibly 27 years old, but I’d double check his ID if I were you
  • His dad is named Bill Borgen, which is adorable
  • They let him take care of Matty Beniers for some reason?
  • He’s a good billboard

Jared McCann

  • Known as “The Pastor” on Twitter
  • I actually have no idea if he’s really a pastor or not, but it fits somehow
  • His corgi Cheddar has its own Instagram account
  • When he walks in all in black with that big hat on whewwwww dang đŸ”„

Vince Dunn

  • Sweet face, no thoughts in head
  • Most likely to be confused by the mini-mic question
  • Also one of the most likely to score goals and assists and stuff, so that’s cool
  • Likes to start trouble and then skate away and let someone else finish it

Jordan Eberle

Yanni Gourde

  • Number one chaos gremlin 
  • Five feet nine inches of curly hair and mischief
  • You’ve never had as much fun as he does when he’s fighting
  • Met his wife in middle school math class
  • At home, he transforms into furniture-building Super Dad

Philipp Grubauer

  • Nicknamed “The German Gentleman,” and it fits both his dress and his demeanor
  • They’re not booing, they’re Gruuuuing
  • Formerly a Rockies fan, he’s been converted and is now known to hang out in the Pen during Mariners games
  • Wants to be a cowboy when he grows up

Tye Kartye 

  • Went from being undrafted to being the AHL Rookie of the Year
  • Also only the eighth player in history to score a playoff goal in his NHL debut
  • Full heart, strong legs, can’t lose
  • When he does score it’s a “Kartye Party”
  • 😋

Jaden Schwartz

  • Look man, I am so sorry Jaden Schwartz, but this is the one guy I always forget about. 

Chandler Stephenson

  • Signed a long-term contract in Seattle in part because of his friendships with Jaden Schwartz and AndrĂ© Burakovsky
  • It is important to me you know he has a floppy-eared black Lab named Finley
  • Yes, of course I am going to show you a picture of Finley
  • Has held the Stanley Cup twice, so he must be like, SUPER strong

Josh Mahura

  • Has two photos on his Instagram. TWO. I will shame you into posting more, Josh Mahura.

Shane Wright 

  • 2022’s expected number-one draft pick who was somehow still available when the Kraken picked him at #4
  • "I'm gonna have a chip on my shoulder from this”
  • Team Canada captain for 2023 World Juniors
  • Opening the season with the big club this year—look for him to try to prove himself and hold his spot
  • Hopefully that includes lots more eye-popping goals like this

Ryker Evans 

  • First of all, we call him Garth
  • He spent his teenage years playing in a league called “SMAAAHL”
  • Along with Tye Kartye, modeled the Firebirds Pride jerseys last year on Instagram
  • SMAAAAAAAHL
  • I think he looks like ChloĂ« Sevigny, don’t you?
Brandon Montour put his baby in the Stanley Cup. BILLIE WINTER

Brandon Montour

Joey Daccord

Buoy

  • The Kraken’s gender-ambiguous mascot who is both a literal and a figurative troll
  • Why does their hair smell so good?
  • Wanders the arena with a drum and an appetite for trouble
  • Seriously, watch out for mischief
  • Don’t look now, but they’re probably right behind you

How to Get Kraken 

Now's your chance to give tentacles or a tricorn a go. Billie Winter

This season Kraken games will be broadcast free on KONG and KING5, but if you’re able, hockey is really best experienced in person. The speed, the power, and the relentless pace are difficult to convey on television. Here’s your gameday guide to Climate Pledge Arena.

Before the game

  • Every Kraken ticket comes with a free transit pass, accessed through the Kraken app, that’s valid two hours before and after the game. Parking is expensive and postgame traffic is gnarly. Walk, bike, or transit if you can.
  • The Kraken host pregame activities in the Seattle Center Armory on Saturdays and Sundays, including things like face painting, sign making, and photo ops. Food here is cheaper than in the arena, but the lines are much longer.
  • If you get to the game early, you can watch warmups next to the glass. The Kraken come out to warm up about a half hour before game time, but arrive 10-15 minutes earlier than that if you want to get a good spot.

During the Game

  • The Kraken have a fun and elaborate preshow that you’ll want to be in your seat for, including beautiful video and an orchestral theme composed by Hans Zimmer himself.
  • Like several other local sports teams, the Kraken invite you to stand for the anthem if you’re “willing and able.” It’s unlikely you’ll get any flak if you don’t. The important part is that you yell “RED GLARE!” along with that lyric, a team-specific ritual that references the Kraken logo’s glowing red eye. 
  • Not EVERYONE yells out player last names during goal announcements, a la Sounders games, but if it’s an ingrained habit you won’t be alone.
  • Lots of people like to dress up like pirates or cephalopods. LOTS of them. It’s pretty cool, actually. If you’ve ever wanted to give tentacles or a tricorn a go, now’s your chance.
  • There are tall nets at the goal ends and the glass is tall; you are almost certainly not going to be on the receiving end of a flying puck. But if you do, you get to keep it!
  • If you’re a person who uses the men’s bathroom, well—plan ahead.

Food & Drink

  • I’m going to be real: Beer is expensive. Food is expensive. But the lines are fast, the variety is pretty good, and the Kraken honor their arena name by sourcing food from within 300 miles of Climate Pledge. New options this year include soup dumplings from Dumpling House, Chili Crunch Yakisoba at Noodle Nirvana, and a roving ice cream cart selling a house-made take on the Choco Taco.
  • Vegetarian and vegan fans should aim for the Impossible Test Kitchen or 1st Ave Nachos; for a fuller selection of meatless dishes you’ll unfortunately need a Club or other premium ticket.
  • The refillable sodas offered the first two seasons have unfortunately been replaced with appallingly overpriced vending machines. They accept credit cards, spare limbs, and firstborn children. Smaller cans, plus the usual water, energy drinks, iced coffee, etc. are available in concession stand coolers. Non-alcoholic beer is also stocked at several locations.

After the Game

  • When the Kraken win, which they do a lot lately, stick around after the game for the Yeeting of the Fish. The top players will skate out with plush salmon, inspired by Pike Place Market, and fling them into the crowd for lucky recipients to take home. The salmon are constructed for accuracy, and the variety changes every year.
  • Nearby bus arrival times are posted on the large screen facing the First Avenue North exits so you know whether you need to saunter or run.
  • On the way home, check Twitter to find out who won the Davy Jones Hat.
  • Did the Kraken get a shutout? Congratulations, you’re now morally obligated to eat a donut the next day. (It’s a burdensome duty, but I believe you can do it.)

Yeet. Sleep. Repeat. Go Kraken.

✌ BILLIE WINTER